Estranged - Deranges - Dangers - Angered - Granted

On my way home from a Hasidic wedding this evening, I hit upon a word which transmits pretty much how I have been feeling for a week or two - estranged. Of course, I tried to rearrange its letters into another word, but failed to come up with anything which used all the letters. Deranges came the closest, along with its anagram, grandees. Dangers and angered didn't do badly.

I found it interesting that estranged contains so many negative words - of course, in my mood, I would be more likely to find them.

The day before yesterday I found a list my mother made when we were waiting for admission to a popular gallery show in England ten years ago or so - words that can be made from the letters in apocalypse. (Hmm, I wonder if she found calypso. Probably - she found polyp!) I miss her, for many reasons, although sad to say, she wasn't actually a very good parent. But paradoxically, no-one could make me feel as valued, as needed, as special, as worthy of love as she did. It's a basic human need to feel well and truly loved, appreciated, valued. I'd give a lot for my mother's arms around me right now.

Flowers and Happiness

Sweet Twinerik brought me these flowers Saturday night - it was such a wonderful treat! The colors are amazing - bright lime mumlets, intense pink giganto mum in the center, and a variety of cerises, wines, and lemons - devastatingly beautiful. Who would have thought bright lime flowers would be so satisfying? And the central deep pink mum against the scattered dark wine red blossoms - wow. I love just sitting and drinking in all the color. It is mesmerizing.